THE MONSTER CALLED FAVICON!!!

"THE MONSTER CALLED FAVICON!!!"
 

15th of Julius, being MMXII in the Year of our Lord. 

There is a minute monster in our midst.  A craven creature who lurks in the webbed corners of cyberspace.  This monster watches us all from nearly every location in the inter-webs; observing, lurking, calculating.  It is watching thee now & there is no way to escape it's glare & stay online!  This monster is called . . .

. . . the FAVICON!!!

I will tell thee where it is so thou too may stare the beast in the eye & know the Favicon for what it truly is!  Look up to thy web address bar, to the left hand side.  Dost thou see the little emblem?  That is the Favicon!  That 16 pixel by 16 pixel cretin of multicolored design!  The Favicon also lurks above it's address bar lair, nesting in thy web browser tabs where it can watch us with many different eyes!  

The Favicon, so named for being a Favorite Icon, is an elusive beast that is only caught by the best blog knights & website design wizards.  It prowls the web like a cyber rat, evading capture by the newest blog squires & design apprentices.  If thou desires the look of success that so many websites hold then thou too must pay the unknown price to this mysterious beast so that it may change it's look & wear thy insignia.  

I tell thee my tale of blight & pain so that thou may assist me in my quest, if thou art strong enough.  I have scoured the internet wastelands for over a week in search of the Sages of lost inter-web lore.  Many sages have I found who tell me their tales of Favicon capture & display, each with their own twist on Favicon capturing techniques.  However, it seems the creature has mutated in some unknown way, evading capture for my Blogger site.  

It may be that the Favicon was a beloved website pet of times past but I warn thee now, the Favicon is changing into an uncontrollable Beast!!!  It can evade capture from Blogger's template & layout augmenter mechanisms!  It hath also eluded the barbed trap of HTML coding!  I submit to thee that if this monster can not be reigned in soon, then there is little that will be able stop the beast from conquering all of the InterWebs!  All of our screens will turn to this:

And there will be no space for anything else!!! BEWARE!!! AND HELP ME SAVE THE CYBER WORLD FROM ULTIMATE PERIL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(To translate into a more mundane version of speech, I can't figure out why I cannot personalize my Favicon image.  If anyone has any suggestions it would be greatly appreciated!)

 UPDATE!: I hath nearly captured the beast!  Now the dreaded Favicon flickers between this website's stock insignia & my own.  Victory is nearly at hand!!!

The Cure for an "Epic-Drained" Day

8th July 2012  "The Cure for an "Epic-Drained" Day"


So I need a quick show of hands, who gets to slay dragons everyday?  Or rescue a princess (or prince, or a kitten)?  Or defeat an evil wizard?  Or super villain?  Or an army of wicked pygmy aliens bent on world domination?  Yeah, me neither.  It kinda sucks too. Everyday life can be horribly mundane, don't you think?  

There is nothing courageous in doing everything "the way you are supposed to".  There's nothing heroic in working like a fiend in an okay job that you "can" do but does not come anywhere close to what you are called to do.  There's nothing epic in paying your bills & trying to not starve; particularly when you're not in the wild where starving is an actual risk.  

There's a serious lack of awesome in modern life. No dragons to slay or villains to stop.  The soul-sucking absence of a quest is draining.  I heard it said best, "Absence of conflict does not denote presence of peace."

So I have a solution a "5-Steps to More Epic Day" you can apply everyday to break up the monotony:

1. Make it harder.  Taking out the trash is so ordinary.  Creating a new sport is epic: Trash Sport
2. Get sneaky. Don't just say hi to a friend, sneak up on them (as long as they're not someone with rough combat reactions)
3. Take the long way. Going up or down stairs conventionally is boring so try something new. Better yet, train in Parkour before you get too crazy.  Don't let this happen.
4. Narrate everything.  Animals, people driving next to you, children, or your own actions get infinitely more entertaining when you narrate the happenings. 
5. Add a soundtrack.  Every hero has a cool soundtrack & music is good for the soul; but don't do it like Kronk

If these don't make your day-to-day more Epic, it'll at least be more entertaining or your money back!

To get a return on your money would you first please send me a payment.  

Money Orders, Cash, or Paypal are fine.  

After your payment is processed I'll be sure to return a portion. 

Guaranteed. 


P.S.: Thanks to the Youtube contributors for the links used in this post.